To The One That Got Away

To The-One-That-Got-Away,

It’s Valentine’s Day soon and somehow I can’t stop thinking about how we spent it together last year.

It felt like destiny (to me) that first moment our eyes met. The loud music of the party ceased to ring in my ears, all I could hear was the thumping of my heart. Flushed, I looked at you hoping you wouldn’t notice the colour that had risen in my cheeks since your arrival. You chatted with my friends and I kicked myself for not being able to think of something smart to say to attract your attention. You moved on to party the night away with you friends and your dimpled smile left me with a mild heart break.

A few days later, mid way through cooking lunch, I glanced through the new notifications on my phone. The flatmate messaging group abuzz with bitching about our rent hike, grinning, I scrolled on and there you were in my notifications. 1 NEW FOLLOW REQUEST! I spent the night waiting for you to initiate conversation but nada.

Swipe left, swipe left, swipe left – I swiped left in frustration. Sitting in office on a boring Monday, wondering why there wasn’t one decent single boy out there for me to date. It had been a while since I had been on a date – maybe I was expecting too much. And there you were, again, almost like I had willed you on to the app and into liking my profile. Heart racing, I swiped right!

It was finally date night – exactly a month after our first meeting! The night started off awkwardly but some light banter, a few drinks, a cheesy pizza and a few trashy movies later – I was the happiest girl! Butterflies screamed havoc in my stomach as you slipped my hand into yours. And then I leaned into the most perfect moment of my life.

I wish everything after had been perfect too but I wouldn’t be writing this letter then…

She came back, you were confused and things were never as perfect as that moment. In an ideal world, I would have professed my love to you and asked you to choose me but in this practical world, letting go seemed easier. Maybe it wasn’t destiny that brought us together, maybe it was sheer dumb luck. So instead I chose to enjoy our moments together, stolen from destiny – the mid-work coffee breaks, the trashy movie outings, smoking up and laughing till our insides hurt, last Valentine’s day – moments that to me were perfection.

I don’t think of you often anymore but every now and then – someone’s smile reminds me of that damn dimple or a relatable meme will take me back in time or just someone with a similar name will remind of that boy I fell for in one glance. And every single time you cross my mind – my phone buzzes – and your name flashes – making me believe that our fates are intertwined in some way. And every single time I think, what if..?

Yours no more

I might still be in love with you

I know you care about me too

Hope you’re happy, babe!

Happy Valentine’s Day.

XO

——XXXXX—–

Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

This is a fictional letter though I did seek some inspiration from my dating life. Writing a letter to the one that got away always seems like such a beautiful end to something that might have been. Also, just because it didn’t work out with someone – doesn’t mean you still can’t be friends. Do you have a one that got away? What would you say to them?

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18 Comments Add yours

  1. This is both heartbreaking and beautiful – loved it!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Happy Panda says:

      Thank you so much! 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Sorry for the accidental unfollow! Was clearing out my subscriptions and hit the wrong button. Fixed it up though!

    I can’t say I have somebody who got away. Those who aren’t in my life before definitely vacated for a reason so I’m glad of that. I want what is for me and nothing more or less. One time though, I met a guy who seemed completely different from the rest. He was sweet, charming, handsome- the works really. He just hadn’t been through enough in life to understand hardship and the way it affects people. I knew he wasn’t somebody I could rely on next time my trauma resurfaced. He wouldn’t know what to say. He was very much a boy. A boy I was attempting to mould into my idea of the perfect love. I wanted him to meet me where I was at whilst forgetting that he could only perceive our situation from his standing.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Happy Panda says:

      No worries, hun!

      Aww, I totally get it. All the people from my past – I know I met them for a reason and it didn’t work out because it wasn’t right. Hopefully I’ll meet ‘the one’ soon. 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Shelly DS says:

    OMG this really had me fixated all the way through. I loved every bit of it and am somewhat relieved that it isn’t entirely real. That fictional man would’ve gotten a slap all the way from South Africa! Great post hun, I really enjoyed it 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. OMG, Shelly, that is a serious slap. Haha!

      Like

    2. Happy Panda says:

      Hahahahahah! Your comment made my day. 😂
      Thank you so much!! ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh, I am glad this is fictional and you are not heartbroken!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Happy Panda says:

      Haha, I’ve had my share of heartbreaks but not heartbroken as of now. 😊

      Like

  5. bosssybabe says:

    Beautiful letter (even if it’s fiction) ❤️ Hope next year this time you find your Valentine! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Happy Panda says:

      Aww, thank you so much! ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  6. S says:

    Wow that was fiction?? It felt so real!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Happy Panda says:

      Haha, it wasn’t entirely fiction – I definitely did take a lot of inspiration from something in my past. 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  7. tanvibytes says:

    Omg, this was heartbreaking– but so beautifully written! 🎀🌟 I’m glad if was fiction, I was starting to feel sad 🤣. 𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕡𝕪 𝕧𝕒𝕝𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕖’𝕤 𝔻𝕒𝕪! ✨

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Happy Panda says:

    Haha. It wasn’t entirely fiction – took reference from something in my past but yeah the letter and the feelings are fictional. Happy Valentine’s Day!! ❤️❤️

    Like

  9. vaniheart says:

    This is so beautiful 💟💟💟

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Happy Panda says:

      Awww thank you so much ❤️

      Like

  10. Wonani says:

    I LOVED reading this. I love reading letters 😂

    Love is quite the thing. The one’s that got away probably deserved to get away.

    Like

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